A Look Into My JournalJun 08, 2020
This week was mental health awareness week
So above are entries from my Journal in 2018
Looking back at these entries is very emotional. I remember the tears, the no-sleep and just the lack of relationship with myself. I was battling my two minds.
Your two minds
Your emotional brain: here emotion arises, such as sadness but without recognising it as an emotion that will come and go, it can continue to spiral and you could become infested by ANTS (automatic negative thoughts)
This is the part of the brain that rationalises and helps you to make better decisions. Once an emotion is recognised simply by saying ‘this is sadness’ the neocortex can begin to do its work and talk you out of emotion.
When I was writing these journal entries I had no idea about my 2 minds but when I look back I can see the emotional mind is trying to give up but the rational mind is trying to save me.
But what saved me ?
Without realising, journaling those thoughts saved me, I was able to put my thoughts on paper. You can even see, after I write the negative thought, I am actually rationalising it right there, without even recognising the process of the neocortex.
Afterall, it's ok to feel sadness. Sadness arises for a reason. It enforces a kind of reflective retreat from life's busy pursuits, and leaves us in a suspended state to mourn the loss, mull over its meaning, and finally, make the psychological adjustments and new plans that will allow our lives to continue.
Bereavement is useful; full-blown depression is not.
You can also see me using gratitude. Here I was shifting my negative thoughts to what was good. There is so much to be grateful for each day, but we are conditioned to only see the negative. Gratitude can change your whole day and train your brain to see the good.
The next thing that saved me was learning the causes and solutions of anxiety depression in the book Lost Connections. If I could give one book recommendation for the whole world it would be this book, and not just if you have anxiety and depression! Everyone should read it; then you will have the tools to deal with anything life throws your way, and if any of your loved ones need help, you have the answers.
I showed you my journal today, because I want you to know that you have the power to change your thoughts, if you begin today. Your mind is stronger than you think. You can become strong minded and positive just like me, I have never felt that way ever again due to journaling, reading and therapy. So, if you feel like this right now. There is light. Just begin the process.
Sinead ‘In charge of her own state’ Hegarty
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