Make Therapy Cool
I was actually ordered by my therapist to throw myself a birthday party this year, I have never been one to celebrate my birthday. My therapist reminded me that I deserve to be celebrated so I need to throw myself a party.
Every year I never make a deal and expect nothing on my birthday. But what I’ve realized is that by expecting nothing and not planning anything it ultimately shields me from feeling hurt. I’m guessing when I was younger I may have been hurt or let down on some birthdays so I just decided to close that door to avoid feeling let down.
I think people have the idea that if you have a therapist you must be nuts. I want people to know that’s not the case. Having therapy has given me so much confidence in myself by rewiring my old thought patterns. Sometimes we need an extra boost in our lives to remind ourselves we are amazing and we deserve happiness.
I even called my therapist before releasing my...
To be a good friend you must inspect your own thoughts.
I want you to reflect today on how good a friend you are. I want you to dig deep and figure this out.
First thing I want you to ask yourself is do you truly listen to your friends ?
Are you listening or are you waiting for them to finish talking in order to talk about you ?
Are you listening or are you thinking of something that happened to you on friday night ?
Are you listening or are you waiting to talk about your problems so your friends can validate them ?
Are you listening or are you waiting to butt in with your ‘better’ story ?
From now on I want you to inspect all your thoughts when you're around your friends. What makes you feel bad ? Does it annoy you when they dont ask about you, how you're doing? Or what's going on in your love life ?but yet you are constantly talking about them. Note that down and it will teach you to always ask about your friends. Ask them how they are doing in the...
Us, Irish have a rep of being heavy drinkers… and it wouldn’t be wrong.
This weekend the pubs were open for the first time in 3 months so of course, we all fled to them. I wish I could say I visited the local for the opening night and that was it, but I basically moved in there this weekend. So much so, it had me questioning why I pay extortionate rent in Dublin when I spent half of this week in the pub. However, I think we can all use the fact the pubs haven’t been opened in 3 months as an excuse.
But even with the excuse I still don’t let myself off lightly in my journal. In my journal, I like to question all my behaviors, good or bad.
Today I questioned why I drink so much, or even why we all drink so much. Firstly we drink to switch off. Alcohol has the power to switch off our thinking brain. We stop worrying about the past and present and we just enjoy the moment. We don’t care what people think as much... Like who the hell...
‘I will read that book when I’m in a better state of mind’
‘I will do that course when I have more time’
‘I will do that workout when I feel good’
‘I will meditate when I’m in a better place’
I’m going to let you in on a little secret…You will never feel like it!
We sometimes wait for the gust of motivation to achieve goals, but it’s not motivation we need its 5 seconds of fast courage!
I’ve been reading the 5second Rule by Mel Robbins this week and she is so right- it’s all about making the decision within 5 seconds before our brains talk us out of it.
I think sometimes we get the message from our guidance system
‘Do that course’
‘Read that book’
‘Speak up at the meeting with your idea’
‘Do the workout’
‘Go speak to that guy at the bar’
‘Start writing a book’...
Mark Manson sent an email today ( If you are not on his mailing list get on it!) One of the questions he asked himself today was;
What’s the best thing that has ever happened to me?
He goes on to describe how the pandemic as tragic as it was, it was one of the best things that could have happened to him due to what he has achieved, how he has changed his outlook on life and the amount of quality time spent with his family.
This got me thinking about some of the best things that have happened to me, the ones that made the most impact on my life are the ones that at the time seemed so tragic at the time.
Being broke as f********k was one of the best things that ever happened to me!
When I reached my lowest point and hadn’t a scent to my name: what I realized was that, it wasn’t the end of the world. I still had my health and my mindset. I had a roof over my head and some amazing friends to talk to.
All that worry about being...
Stop telling yourself you're going to do the workout later? read the book later? do the course later?
Take action now, write down exactly what you're going to do tomorrow in a schedule and hold yourself to this schedule. Tell someone your schedule or get someone to do it with you so become accountable.
I’m speaking from my experience yesterday, I thought I wouldn’t schedule my day yesterday because;
“Well I can't go outside as I’m in quarantine so ill get it all done at some point or later"
Nope! I spent the day worrying and scrolling on my phone instead of being productive. I gave into my lower self, and what happens when you give in to your lower self, you feel this little pit of anxiety as you know you can do better! You know deep down that pit of anxiety isn't for no reason, its a call to listen to your potential!
Listen to your little pit and get it done!
I keep seeing the word “Bored’ all day as people are now self-isolating.
I want to tell you why I removed this word from my vocabulary
I haven't said ‘I'm bored’ in 2 years
I decided to always be a student every day, there is always something new to learn each day so if you are ‘Bored’ pick a subject and go and research.
At the moment I am studying attraction and love, I type these words into Youtube and watch TED talks, I then move to written research and my books.
There is no such thing as being a master of a field, you can always learn more.
You must realize an ‘expert’ is only someone who knows something more than another person, They don't know everything about that subject, they continue to learn each day and that's why they succeed in their field of expertise.
You can be a student at any point of the day. A question someone asked me the other day
‘How do you deal with someone you don't particularly like in a social...
So, I'm back in Dublin now after 8 weeks isolated in the country with my parents. I guess I will be here now for the foreseeable, which I'm pretty happy about. I love dublin, I love how friendly everyone is and I always say I’m super aligned walking around the city.
As an extrovert, I actually get a buzz off new peoples faces, I love talking to strangers and just generally interacting.
It's funny to watch the reactions of others as I interact. When I'm buying my lunch or a coffee, I ask the waiter or shop attendant their name straight away and ask how they're doing. Some people giggle and think it's a little forward. When someone asks me how I am I say
‘I’m Fantastic !’
I try my best to use transformational vocabulary to not only transform my emotions, but to transform others. Today, at the food hatch I asked his name and had a bit of chat- he had a bit of giggle at me but I know I transformed his emotion and gave him a little kick...
My dog is very ill at the moment, he is 14.5 years old (the little cutie) He can barely use his two back legs but whenever he sees the cat outside he makes a run for him.
Why does my dog do this when he is so unable and after is in such pain ?
Because unlike us humans, he doesn't have a neocortex region in his brain to break down the information in front of him to make better decisions. He uses his amygdala (the emotional brain)
This part of the brain keeps us alive, all information we see in front of us, goes straight to the amygdala and we can react as quickly as possible to keep us safe.
Now lets learn how to deal with anger using this information
How we deal with anger comes down to our emotional intelligence, when we see something we immediately react with emotion. If someone pulls out in front of us in traffic we immediately react in anger, maybe we go crazy and start beeping, maybe we curse or maybe you try to get revenge ?